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“Remorseful” New York Times retracts 347th article in a row

At 11:47 p.m. on Sunday evening, The New York Times made the latest in a series of corrections, nobly admitting that they had made a “teeny weeny” omission in their recent piece on Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh. 

“We originally left the word not out of the article,” the correction originally read. “Although we left it out several times, it was only one word, so we are only counting it as one error. We are sure you will agree.”

However, pressed by Journalism 101 professors everywhere to show a “shred of journalistic integrity,” the Times eventually relented and released the following more thorough correction:

“The statement that his accuser did recall the incident described in the accusation should have read, ‘She did not recall the incident described.’

“The accusation that the witness could describe Kavanaugh should have read, ‘The witness could not describe Kavanaugh.’

“Our declaration that we know good reporting when it hits us squarely in the face should have read, ‘We do not know good reporting,’ and it should have been followed by a frank admission that we also really don’t care.

“We deeply, sincerely, mournfully regret these completely accidental omissions.”

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