A purported environmental activist proposing baby consumption has been outed as a Chick-fil-A spokescow. Now, fellow attendees at Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s town hall say they are afraid that the cow’s valid ideas will not be taken seriously.
The heifer apparently dressed as a woman in order to infiltrate the question-and-answer session held by Ocasio-Cortez, likely in an attempt to further the cow agenda of pushing other forms of meat. Cows have long been known to suggest other animals as culinary fare in order to prevent humans from using cows as food.
The faux woman apparently put on a believable show, eloquently explaining how the consumption of excess babies was a necessary step in preventing overpopulation. Many audience members were impressed with the logic of the proposition and hoped that the idea would quickly gain traction.
Now, they fear the scandal has tainted their cause.
“I’m afraid that people will ignore the whole proposal just because the person suggesting it wasn’t exactly their idea of a person,” worried one such attendee. “I just want people to remember that cows can be people too, and sometimes real people aren’t even exactly people, so we should totally listen to a cow as much as we would any other person, because that person might not really be what I think of as an actual person anyway.”
She concluded articulately, “Like, sometimes people aren’t even really people.”
Although the cow apparently had ulterior motives, the real environmental activists at the event said they would take up the cause. “Even though she wasn’t doing it for the right reason,” reflected one such woman, “protecting the environment by killing small humans still just makes good sense.”
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