For the first year since their inception, the New York Times was entered into the running for the prestigious Newberry Award for children’s literature. And judging by their unanimous win, it seems that children’s fiction contests were the place for them all along.
The road to this triumph has proven to be a rocky one for the Times, as they have tried to find a place for themselves among the plethora of literature categories. Once a respected source of news and commentary, they began to flounder when news magazines such as The National Enquirer repeatedly beat them to the punch on blockbuster stories such as “Bigfoot Finally Found” and “Elvis Is My Local Mechanic.”
Failing to enjoy the luck that other publications did, the desperate Times writers unfortunately began to fabricate obviously fictitious tales, yet continued to publish them under the guise of real news. They were quickly investigated and determined to be “big fat stinking liar faces,” or BFSLF, according to Snopes (which, it should be noted, is thus far the only publication not to ever receive their own BFSLF warning).
Humiliated, Times editors knew it was time to rebrand and openly enter the world of fiction. After being denied eligibility to all of the more adult categories, they were finally accepted by children’s literature foundations, which has proven to be a perfect fit for their unrealistic, made-for-TV-movies style of writing. And they couldn’t be happier.
“I’ve always loved writing fiction,” beamed one former “reporter.” “And now I don’t have to base all of my stories on boring real events.”
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